Motherhood Truth #7- Great Expectations.

What I am about to share with you will probably not go down in history. You see, looking back, it seems such a simple thing, I can scarcely believe I've not lived like this for longer. It makes so much sense to me, that I just have to share it.

Like many of my enlightened moments, my husband is at the centre of this one. For as long as I've known him, my husband has often talked about the importance of managing expectations, whether it's with people, tasks, etc. For example, if you're planning to visit someone, say from the start how long you are planning to stay until, in order that things don't get out of hand, and you are able to keep other commitments etc.

Just recently, after a period of challenge that I am still emerging from, I felt like I was achieving very little each day. I had a long list of things that needed to be done, and a list of things I would love to be able to do with my time, but hardly anything was getting done, because, hello, children.

I have recently started calling my children "Licious Delicious", because they are truly scrumptious. I am completely besotted with them. Each day ends with a review of photos from their entire lives (okay, so just from that day), as I drink in all the cuteness.

But I have to admit. Sometimes, they get the better of me. Sometimes, I spend time re-doing sabotaged tasks over, and over, and over, and over, and over again. And then at least one more time, and it means that I come to the end of my day/week/month and I look at my list of things to do, and I see maybe one thing crossed off that list and I think "HOW HAVE I NOT DONE MORE THAN THAT?"
My to do list offers no prizes for valiant triers. I know what you're thinking. Time for a new to do list.

AND YOU ARE RIGHT!


Time for a to do list that allows me to be a Mummy and a Housewife, because they are two very different things, and usually, I find that if I am one, I am not very good at being the other. If I've had a good housewife day, it usually means a pretty cop-out Mummy day, where CeBeebies has reigned supreme. Conversely, a good Mummy day, usually leaves in its wake war torn destruction. So. You win some, you lose some.
Anyway. Here's the crux of what I'm trying to say. I needed a new to do list. I needed to manage my expectations. I am starting to implement a "One job a day" to do list.

EG: Tuesday 13th June- Load a wash and a dry.

It's brief. It's concise. Best of all? It's manageable.

So at the end of today, I will review my list and see that I have completed everything on it (and some, actually...today has been a pretty good day).
Compare that feeling to how it was before when out of 20 chores on my daily list, I'd only completed one.

Has the amount I've done changed? No.

The only thing that's changed is what I have expected of myself.

So, people, let's be real. Let's accept that having a completely tidy house from top to bottom all on the same day is unlikely to happen. Keeping a house tidy with young children is like the painting of the Forth Road Bridge. By the time you finish, it's time to start again!
Expect less of yourselves, not because you aren't capable of great things, but because you ARE!!! What we do is amazing! It's hard, it's challenging and it's difficult to feel on top of it.

So, have great expectations...but maybe only one a day!